Unable to fall asleep! Just too many thoughts swirling around in my head! So, here I am--sitting on the sofa in the family room, all by myself, in a very quiet house. First, I spent some time reading the Bible, concentrating on the good stuff found therein--a very worthwhile use of time like this! Now my thoughts are beginning to spread in various directions.
The World of the HospitalIt's a whole different world in the hospital! There are people there from all different walks of life, under all different circumstances. Some are troubled over what will happen next; some are grieving over what has just happened; some are rejoicing over the arrival of a new baby; some are there just to comfort someone else; some are totally bewildered about the whole scene! However, over the course of a week spent there, you become quite familiar with the scene, and you get used to the routine of your reason for being there. Plus, many faces become quite familiar -- you become a family. Sometimes you greet one another cheerfully. Sometimes you just can't manage another smile. Sometimes you are in tears and wish you could just hide away and cry for awhile in private. Sometimes you feel like helping everyone you see who needs a friend. Sometimes you wish someone would notice that you are the one who needs a friend. Sometimes you are so lost in deep thought that you hardly notice anyone else. Sometimes you just can't believe what is happening to you and someone you love. But, one thing undeniable I noticed: Everyone seems to understand that you're all in this different world together.
Caretaker or Caregiver?Soon after Larry came home from the hospital, I announced (in this blog) that I would be busy with my new job as "full-time nurse and caretaker". Ever since then, I've been thinking about the difference between a "care-taker" and care-giver". Which is which? When I discussed this with Larry he said that in our situation I am the care-giver and he is the care-taker. In other words, I am giving care to him and he is taking care from me. Yet, I truly have been thriving on giving care to him, and that, in turn, has been giving care to me too! Well, I will admit--I do get just a little weary now and then (like this morning--I slept on the couch until 11:00 A.M.!), but mostly I enjoy taking care of him. So, I guess that makes me a care-taker -- or am I care-giver? Perhaps I am both. Perhaps both are the same!
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away -- Blessed be the name of the Lord!On August 24th Larry lost his job. On (or about) September 27th Larry lost his health. On September 28th Larry lost his health insurance. (His former employer went bankrupt, and since the company was self-insured, the insurance coverage ended--period--no "ifs", "ands", or "buts" about it!) What's next to lose? Certainly not our faith in God! God has a purpose in all of this. He has never failed us, and He never will. He is forever faithful! Blessed be the name of the Lord!
Now I am going back to bed.